


Let Me Help You

by casostrophe



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Bucky Barnes Feels, Bucky Barnes Needs a Hug, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Post-Captain America: The Winter Soldier, Post-Serum Steve Rogers, Steve Rogers Feels, Steve Rogers Needs a Hug, Steve curses like seven times
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-19
Updated: 2018-08-19
Packaged: 2019-06-29 18:53:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,174
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15735357
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/casostrophe/pseuds/casostrophe
Summary: Bucky finds Steve and they have a talk.





	Let Me Help You

**Author's Note:**

> I was in my feels and decided to create some kinda angst-kinda fluffy content. 
> 
> *first published fic give me some love* please

The door shuts softly behind him with a soft click. His hands reaching for his jacket zipper, pausing when he glances up and notices someone on his couch.

Neither of them say anything. Steve frozen in shock and the desire to not make Bucky run. And Bucky tense and waiting for Steve’s move.

“Hey, Buck.” Steve croaks after a few minutes of both of them remaining motionless. He doesn’t move from his spot by the door, but he does take off his coat, twisting the fabric in his hands.

“Is it true?”

Steve furrows his brow. “Is what true?”

Bucky’s blank eyes spark for a moment, annoyance glinting there for one short second before slipping back to emptiness. “That I’m him.”

“That you’re Bucky?” Steve asks, Bucky nods. “Of course you are. Might’ve got a little jumbled along the way but you’re still you.”

“How do you know?”

A frown ghosts over Bucky’s face. His whole expression just sad and so tired. He looks so innocent and small this way, vulnerable. All Steve wants to do is wrap him up in blankets and protect him from the world.

“Well, for starters, you’re here now.” Steve almost laughs, but the glare Bucky sends his way stops him mid-action. “And I’ve only seen you like twice, three time being now, and every encounter has at least touched you in a way, yeah?”

Bucky blinks at Steve before his eyes slide to the floor, brow furrowing and hair cascading over his face. His lips poke out in a frown. The smallest of smiles dares to cross Steve’s mouth as he recalls that that’s Bucky’s thinking face.

Even now as they sit here, quietly doing nothing, Steve can pick apart Bucky’s mannerisms from this person he’s become. Under all the hate Hydra built, the foundation of Bucky’s true self is still there.

“I went to the museum.” Bucky says suddenly, head snapping up so he can lock eyes with Steve.

“Yeah?”

Bucky licks his lip, collecting a breath as he narrows his eyes. “I saw- there was a video. Of you- of us. We were laughing and I-“ he stops to shake his head.

Steve takes this as his cue to step in. “Yeah, I saw it too. Before the bridge, I went and visited it.” He pauses, wondering if he should mention that he saw Peggy too. Deciding to save that for another time, he continues. “I remember that day, do you?”

A shake of his head. No.

“Well, for a couple weeks while we were out there, there were these films crews. Flighting around trying to get glimpses of Captain America and his men in action. We were on a break during missions when both of us got caught with the cameras.” Steve bites his lip to hold back a laugh. Bucky watches him with heavy eyes, nothing being missed. “You had said some dumbass joke and I lost it. You lost it too, because you think you’re so damn funny, Buck.”

“I do?”

Steve cocks his head. “Yeah, always cracking us up. The Howlies thought you were the funniest damn person around. Couldn’t be serious for shit around the brass.”

Bucky’s lip twitches and he doesn’t try to hide it. Progress, Steve thinks.

Silence passes between them again. Steve waits for Bucky to fill it. He yearns to hear him speak.

“I don’t remember much,” Bucky sighs. “Nothing is right up here.” He points to his head.

“That’s alright.” Steve says softly, because it is. As long as Bucky’s safe and here now, Steve is blessed. He’s happy.

Noticing he’s still standing by the door with his jacket in his hands, Steve slowly lowers his jacket onto the hookah the wall. He watches Bucky’s face as he takes cautious steps to the chair across the room from him. Bucky watches him warily as situates himself.

When he’s still again, Bucky opens his mouth to speak. “If that was us, and we were happy, why does my brain want me to hate you?”

Steve flinches. “What?”

“My brain. It hates you.” He repeats as if it was obvious, brow furrowing in confusion at Steve’s pained expression. “But the video shows that we were friends, and I didn’t hate you. When I watched it, I felt funny. Like something was lying to me.”

Steve swallows thickly as he nods. His brain scrambling for something to say. So Hydra made Bucky hate him. Or at least, Bucky’s brain. Because if Bucky truly hates him, would he be sitting on Steve’s temporary couch?

No, he wouldn’t. He would be about as far away from Steve as he could get.

“Do you hate me?” Steve blurts instead of his planned question of ‘are you okay?’ He cringes to himself at his bluntness.

Bucky blinks. “No.” Tilts his head to the side. “I don’t think so. Now that I’ve had time. Time away from everything, I don’t think I could hate you.”

Steve doesn’t even try to hide his relieved exhale. His eyes falling shut as he leans his head back, a smile creeping on his face. When he looks back at Bucky the man has an unsure look on his face.

Not for the first time of the night, Steve wishes he could plant himself on the couch beside Bucky, hold him tight, and never let him go. His fingers itch to touch his skin and his mouth yearns to whisper reassurances in his ear, like Bucky did for him many years ago.

It’s a huge struggle to just sit in his chair and stare at the man he’s assumed dead since 1944.

“Hey, Steve?” Bucky says, snapping Steve out of his daze. “Are you okay?”

“Me?!” Steve barks out a laugh, his eyes crazy and mouth twisted in an amused grin. “I’m perfectly fine, pal! Better than I’ve been since I came out the ice. Hell, I’m fucking ecstatic.”

“Because of me?” Bucky asks warily. He eyes Steve cautiously, a little on edge from his outburst.

“Yes, because of you. I thought you were dead.” Steve whispers. “I had no one in this century. Just a legacy that wasn’t really ever me and a shield that I had to carry.” He doesn’t cross the line to mention Peggy now either. Steve’s sure Buck doesn’t remember her.

“I don’t know what I’m doing.” Bucky admits after a stretch of silence. He ducks his head to avoid looking Steve in the eye.

Steve scoots forward on his chair, bringing them closer by a few inches. Now only a foot between them. “I can help you. If you want. Or if not, I have people. Good people that can help.”

“You’d want to help me?” Bucky asks with furrowed brows. His eyes sad and shining. “Why?”

“Because I love you, Buck. You’re my best friend.” Steve replies without a moment’s hesitation. “And I know that if I was in your situation, you’d do the same for me. ‘Til the end of the line, remember?”

Bucky’s lips twitch into a small smile. “Yeah.”

 

**Author's Note:**

> I don’t know if I should continue this. Let me know down in the comments if you want more!!!


End file.
